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My Tribute to Rodney, My First Black Friend — 32 Comments

  1. Thank you William for your heartwarming testimony of love and brotherhood. So important in a week of bombing and beheading. Come quickly Lord Jesus and usher in the eternity of one pulse of harmony. May our Sabbath School lesson for this week help us to remain faithful.

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    • When I first saw the title" My first black friend" I was a bit offended however, when I read the posting I must agreed to; it was a heartwarming personal experience. Having been a Non Christian in my early life and growing up in 5 different countries, the title was kind of offensive. I have lived in Spanish, English Colonies and finally in America where a race label is a must...I could understand this child apprehension in meeting another child with different color skin regardless that he was indeed another American child. As SDA nowadays, it is comforting to know that in 3 areas our humanity is equal everywhere; 1) We all are God's Creation. 2) We all are sinners & 3) We all are blessed by the ultimate sacrifice in the Death of Jesus and our savior. The end result is Unless we see each other through Jesus's eyes... we will see our differences

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      • Wallace thank you for your understanding my title and not being offended. Of course no offense was intended. A few years ago I was on a mission trip to a city in Peru. A young boy of about 10 kept repeatedly touching my arm. Someone told me he kept touching my arm because he was fascinated because I was the first white person he had ever seen. So meeting someone of a different color is not a negative thing.

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  2. God bless you & thank you so much for having the courage to post this for Black History month! God guided me to the SDA in 2005 (live on the Eastern Shore of MD)from a fast during Lent asking God to guide me to a church that could teach the book of Revelation like Pastor Doug on Amazing Facts (watched on BET and God used a laundromat flyer after Sunday worship service prior to playing a co-ed volleyball game to a flyer for Prophecy Code).

    God had guided me to a mostly White SDA church (no problem for me for I grew up in the military with my father being around all cultures and races, so being in an all Black or all White church on Sunday wasn't the norm for me). Upon God guiding me to the SDA; after I was in the church for a while (I had never heard of a SDA) God had me to notice in the SDA churches the words “a Black church” (what year is this).

    Well God sends a first time visitor to my church and tells me to go up and welcome her! She was looking for a church on the Eastern Shore of VA. So I was aware of the Black conferences (God used a soul from the Black conference to explain to me who are the SDA in the body of Christ). I had a question to God why do they have them, if the SDA are God's end time people (how is that possible --can they see themselves). Well this first time visitor upon sharing a church with her in her area (again I am black). Said is that a BLACK CHURCH? (I said God can she see that I am black, why in the world did You send me to her (being honest He knows my mind?) I let it go and shared with her mostly blacks go to the church, but it's in a White conference!

    Well she returned and God said go up to her again (God must I? Obeyed). Well going forward we connected through the Holy Spirit in amazing ways even with her grown children --her daughter returned to the SDA at the age of 57; for they got on her for stating that to me! God had me to send her a card how she made me feel that Sabbath (even said to her God must I go to her again –she laughed and called and apologized to me and explained herself). I was also to connect her with another older member who is a widow as herself in the church for she choose to stay with my church. Well they both are good friends an in 2014 she took the friend at the age 95 year to get her drivers licenses by the way she is 86! Again we are now friends for as you stated it was the unknown.

    Again I still pray about why the SDA even need a Black conference in 2015. Continue in His service & thanks for sharing!

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    • Please read the history of the Adventist Church and how blacks were treated. That will give you a historical perspective of why Regional Conferences (Black) were started. I'm surprised you didn't ask yourself why a White Conference? It appears that in some cases where blacks begin attending White SDA Churches in mass numbers and a African American pastor is assigned, many of the white members begin leaving. We seem to have a serious problem in our churches that I love very much. It's called ?

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      • We can choose our focus. We can choose to focus on the apparent negatives and interpret them in the worst way possible. Or we can choose to focus on the positives. We can choose to see ourselves as victims, or we can choose to see ourselves as victors.

        Problems in "the church" are people problems. You and I are those people. Will we be part of the problem or part of the solution? Does focusing on negatives contribute to the solution or the problem?

        Until you mentioned it, it hadn't occurred to me that a well-loved pastoral couple in our nearly all-white church was black. I recall having a bit of a clash with the pastor in board meetings because he came from a culture where the pastor was the head authority in the church. Yet, our church governance actually gives the authority to the board. He had a little trouble adjusting, but, bless his heart, he did adjust, and I developed the highest respect for him as did my fellow (white) church members. I don't believe that the one black couple in the church was any closer to the pastoral couple than the rest of us. That pastor is gone now, and there are just a few more black folks, a white pastor and a black head elder.

        I realize it isn't that way everywhere. Not everyone is color-blind. But where does the solution lie? Does it lie in blaming "the church"? (Keep in mind that you and I are "the church.") Does it lie in blaming those with a different skin color? (To my mind any ascribing of negatives to a different skin color is a type of racism.)

        Or does the solution lie in surrendering our own hearts to God and reaching out to those who are "different"? I praise God that I have had the privilege to know many who are "different" from me - people who have reached out in friendship when I didn't think of doing so, largely because I've always been a bit shy. (At the ripe old age of 71, I still struggle with that, but only occasionally.)

        Do we have to regard all changes of church demographics to racism, or could it be possible that it just has to do with comfort levels of different ways of doing things? Is it so wrong to have different congregations centered on cultural similarities? I rather enjoy the differences in these different congregations, so I wonder whether it is really necessary to have all cultures blend together in a way that loses the cultural distinctives of all?

        If Europeans want to stand still like penguins when they sing European hymns, is that so bad? If those of African descent do a mini dance as they lead in the singing of those same hymns while the congregants sway in their seats, is that so bad? (For that matter, would it be so bad to have an African-American song book to supplement the "spirituals" in our hymn book?) But it's easy enough to see why the penguins might not want to worship with the dancers. It's awkward for both. 😉

        As for the Regional conferences, it's not nearly as simple as some like to make it. While these conferences were formed because of racial prejudices, that's not why they are maintained, as I've heard numerous times - from the mouths of black administrators and white ones. If the conferences covered different areas, it wouldn't be so hard to just integrate them into the same conference structure. The problem arises because they cover the same territory, and they each function relatively well, with each presiding over churches that may include some cultural diversity. Who should give up what in a conference merger? That thorny question has prevented the mergers for decades. Perhaps some conferences in a particular area can lead the way to see demonstrate how it can be done so that others may follow.

        In the meantime, let's pray for our leadership and learn to appreciate one another's culture.

        I myself have a "penguin" background, but after one life-changing summer of taking on the challenge of leading out in the action-based singing of VBS, I didn't want to go back to penguin behavior, and I didn't. After all, every child naturally moves to music. It's the way God created us. But seeing a little of that in an adult in a penguin congregation makes for potluck dinner conversation, with a friend of mine pointing out, "But she only moves *that* much," holding his fingers about half an inch apart.;) Bit I digress ...

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        • Living in the "frozen north" of Montana in a part of what has been called the empty quarter of the US we have no black churches. There is an Hispanic church that I hear is starting up about 100 miles away but other than that we are basically white northern European.

          One day I hope I can attend a good black church and I hope for potluck they have some sweet potato pie which I have never had. And yes I am a penguin and because the cockroaches tend to evacuate when I sing I generally stay rather quiet.

          I remember about a decade ago a televised evangelistic series supported by the General Conference whose main speaker was Pastor Walter Pearson. Even though it was being televised from a black church the wisdom of the conference leaders thought that they needed to integrate the series by having a white couple introduce each session. When I saw that I thought that was so wrong and was sorely disappointed. What I wanted to see was a series that came from the heart and culture of the black community reaching out to others in the same group not a something for everyone.

          Hybrids are good at getting the best from each group but in many cases something is lost in the process. To me there are times when we need to keep groups intact and enjoy the cultural differences.

          (2)
          • No black churches? At all?? WOW, that really is hard for me to imagine. Yes it quite a sad thing that our churches are culturally segregated. It is such a pity because where I am at the youth is few and the most that there are are in the black churches and that's where I enjoy to go because Sabbath is not just a day where I go worship but is also only time I have a chance to gather with my lovely brothers and sisters and enjoy their company. So for me church is home, its where I go for support, where i let down my hair and unwind, after a tough week of work and school, the company of my brethren and sisters and the soothing songs is really all I need. Once in a while however I do visit the white churches and whenever I do I feel so pitiful for their young people, the church will usually have only a couple of young people and like brother William said of her black friend, you can see the loneliness in their eyes. It is so sad that, because they are 'prejudiced', they miss out of the opportunity to befriend and create long lasting and supportive relationships with people in their age groups in the church. Sadly this is one of the things that chases out the youth of the church, loneliness.

            (2)
        • Wow! Insightful commentary! I have long been in heartache over the leadership rift on the matter of overlapping racial sda conferences. Having attending Atlantic Union College for 4 years in the 90s, the racial divides were ever before me. Born in 1972, I think my experience is one of being baffled by racial tensions. Not having lived through the very rocky 50s and 60s, and growing up in eastern Canada where racial tension seemed to be something distant, I was not burdened by the discrimination of the past. It seemed like such an easy answer - get rid of those embarrassing remnants of the dark ages of American history and INTEGRATE ALREADY. Of course there are many alive today who had to endure the sins of the past church, and they possess the scars over the wounds to prove it. Will not Jesus heal our wounds? I guess the sins of the fathers are visited upon the third generation. Do we need to wait 60 years or more? Or are the mercies of God that are visited upon the tenth generation enough to carry us through, to do the "right" thing? I pray for the church leadership, that someone will listen to that still small voice of God, and hear the answer to this organizational quirk that keeps a small amount of salt on an old, old wound. Who will lead the new, integrated conference? Why, the man (or woman) that God appoints, of course. Could it be that simple?

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      • Hi Don,
        Yes in time God did guide me to the Black history of the SDA Church (God guided me to Dr. George Knight and to a website he was on sharing the SDA Black History for a prison ministry I am apart of at ECI --even to how the Black churches were started in the South from God using Ellen White son). I didn't ask about a White conference for God was still then teaching me the SDA leadership structure, however a Black church came to me first which guided me to knowledge of a Black Conference. In my desire to attend the Potomac Conference Camp Meeting (went from asking God what is a camp meeting to attending the following year three in one year). God blessed me to see the Columbia Union Conference President to address my question to God Himself about the need for a Black Conference & apologized for it at the Allegheny East Conference Camp Meeting on 7/7/07. So there was a need for there is much work our God continues to work in us all to be Christ like! Continue in His service! Deshirl

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  3. Thank you for that story William...it really touched my heart. If you ever get a response from Rodney, please post it. I would love to know. Inspite of the fact that this story had such a positive message, knowing that you guys reunited would be the most perfect ending.

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  4. William,

    Thanks for having the courage to post a comment about your first black friend. I came into the church through my wife. I was not an SDA christian at first. I was a baptist who's uncle had a church. I went to that church and was thinking of being a minister but I had another uncle that operated on the wrong side of the law. I knew because my dad was a police officer and his brother, my uncle on the side of the law was doing some good things. He is still living but the minister uncle is dead.

    I have learned that all are Gods children. I learned that in the SDA church. As a black man I realize the struggle. We all need love and respect for each other no matter what our color is. As for the black and sda churches. I have been to both and them very different. One should worship wherever they want. I current attend a black church where blacks and whites worship together. They is a black minister that preaches each week. I think heaven will be for all people.

    (13)
  5. William, thanks for your story. It's sad that so much divides us. If it's not our color then it's our faith, or something else. As children, we need strong, loving role models to counteract the "stupidity" of prejudice.
    Reading your story I thought about one of my closest aunts. Her children and my siblings and I grew up as close as could be. You might find this hard to believe but it wasn't until I was grown (very grown) before I realized my aunt was white. We just saw her and know her as auntie. I have no doubt that is due to how the adults of the family interacted and what we heard (or did not hear) them say.
    Thanks again for sharing that bit about you.

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  6. As I read your story, I was thinking of Rodney's family. What an extraordinary and courageous mother Rodney had! It was no small decision to move into an all-white neighborhood. And she chose to teach her little boy how to reach out in a positive way.

    Surely that family is a good example for us all.

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  7. So ashamed that in this day and age we are still talking about black and white. I wonder if when we go to heaven, there is going to be color barrier according to the 12 gates. Thank you Jesus that you have a place in your great big heart, for black people who have suffered so much injustices. Or better yet, by the River of life a colored fountain

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    • Eva, I don't think there's a thing wrong with "talking about black and white"! After all, some of us are very bleached out, while others have all of the pigment we lack! 😉 And that's a handy way of distinguishing people at times.

      It's how we talk about "black and white" that matters. Do we talk about black and white the way we talk about red and white roses? Or do we talk about black and white as though there were only white lilies and black thorns?

      God created Adam and Eve with the genetics to produce all the diversity of skin color and facial contours we see in the world today. The diversity is not a bad thing, but a good thing. We teach that to our children, comparing the diversity of humans to the diversity in the world of flowers.

      Why do we forget that flower analogy as adults?

      Oh, but there's one drawback I can think of to this diversity. It's really hard to get good photographs of a diverse couple - one dark and the other pale. How does one get the lighting right? Either the one looks good or the other! H'mm ... use an extra light to shine on the darker one? (This is from personal experience in our lovely diverse family.) But I digress again ...

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      • Inge there is one thing that I didn't know about the creation of Adam and Eve. That they had the genetics to produce children of a color different than white. I have been under the impression the differences were the result of God making changes in those that built the tower of Babble. Enlighten me. In discussing prejudices and discrimination one might wonder why, of all the other skin colors in the world, is it most often black and white? We have a Spanish speaking and a Korean SDA church within 20 minutes of predominantly white member churches where I live. Japanese have a presence in our community also. All are accepting of one another. I really don't want to get into racial issues other than to wonder what is the motivation?

        (0)
  8. Thank you William for such a touching story as it is also referred to Jesus Christ, if Jesus gave up on me, where could I be? You have sparked a nice thought in my brain, I will definitely have a good day, God bless

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  9. Thank you, William, for posting this. I was surprised to find myself crying by the time I finished this. I was the Rodney in the story, and our family integrated suburban neighborhoods in the late 60s and '70s. We had a lot of hateful things happen, including stuff (a cross?) burnt on our lawn, tires slashed, garbage thrown in our pool, and a bullet through our front window. As kids, it seems we were pretty resilient (or clueless), though, and made friends with the neighbors pretty quickly after each move. I have more fun memories of running and laughing and playing with my little white neighbors than memories of those potentially scary incidents. My kids grew up with none of this fear. As I reflect on what seems to be a return to more polarized racial strain and more overt expressions of hate, your story made me pray for the future of this country-- specifically that we do not return to that time when there was much more fear, mistrust, and hate.

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  10. Thanks William for your story. It brings back memories of when my father use to take my sister and I with him to spend the weekend with his white best friend and his family. I appreciate the fact that my father taught us by example that he loved all people. I thank God that we can share our life experiences with one another so that one person at a time we can make a difference in the life of someone who maybe in the valley of decision and need a helping hand. Praise God.

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  11. Shalom! To me it doesnt influence by either being black or white. In this age and time all we must severally ask ourselves is: In my "blackness" and or "whiteness" .....

    Am I a soldier of the Cross—A follower of the Lamb?
    And shall I fear to own His cause, Or blush to speak His name?

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  12. Just touched with your story William as I think of heaven where there shall be no whites, blacks,indians etc but rather just Children Of God.

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  13. heart warming indeed,sadly that's still very much a reality for us in South Africa.white churches...at some point we had 3 churches in one yard... Heaven is going to be a very interesting

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    • Hi Khumo, I am also from South Africa and agree we are still dealing with the results of decisions, thoughts and actions of our forbearers and will be for generations to come. Governments can only undo so much of past injustices without the pendulum swinging to the other extreme. I agree those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it, but if we continue to throw the past in each other's faces we will just perpetuate the problem, we need to use the past to educate and encourage each new generation to make better decisions, think positively and act responsibly. I believe those of us who are being re-created in the image of the LORD have a part to play in helping others in SA to realize if we all work together we will make a better country for all.
      Khumo, I don't know if you have experienced it yet, but I have noticed that the SDA church in SA have started, have made a few steps, down the path to Jesus' goal/prayer that we will be one. We can only trust that with the Holy Spirit's guidance they continue to the end. Praise the LORD this world is not our home, we are all strangers and aliens here, we are just passing through to our home in heaven and one day to an earth made new and perfect once again.

      (5)
  14. If we truly believe in our savior we should Throw away this thing about he's black or she's white or what ever.Our savior created us all,if we continue to dwell on this subject we are going to be turned away from Gods kingdom,we are all filthy rags.We had better take heed of this quarters lesson,seek wisdom from above,or we will burn in the lake of fire with satan,then he, the evil one will have won our souls.
    James B Demond

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  15. Happy Sabbath! Thank you, William, for the touching story. It certainly makes you pause to think. "Red and yellow, black and white all are precious in His sight! Jesus loves the little children of the world!" Praise God for His color blindness! I live in Charleston, West Virginia where we also have two churches, one in a "white" conference and the other in a "black" conference. But, both churches are integrated; and, as far as I know, both conferences are integrated. So, why do we continue to have two conferences covering the same territory. It makes no sense to me! I have attended and served as speaker and SS teacher in both churches and see no reason why we have separate "chains of command". If both were in the same conference, our outreach efforts would be much more effective and conference management would, seems to me, be more economical. Personally, I prefer the "black" church; but, my wife prefers the "white" church because that's where she grew up in Christ. Guess which church I attend?! "Black" or "white", I love this world wide church, in spite of the cultural differences, because this church preaches / teaches all the truth about Jesus. God bless the Seventh-day Adventist church!!

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    • Michael, today February 28, 2015 at 6 P.M EST, there is an online conversation about this very topic.
      Titled: Are we Still Relevant? A Candid Discussion about Regional Conferences
      Hear perspectives from: Dwight Nelson, Dan Jackson, & Regional Conference Presidents.
      Link for viewing: http://youtu.be/Rm64ppLIvGs

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