She Did So Much For Me, and I Never Got to Thank her.
In evangelism workshops its almost become a cliche now,
Jesus…reached the hearts of the people by going among them as one who desired their good. ….. He met them at their daily vocations, and manifested an interest in their secular affairs.-Ellen White, The Desire of Ages, p. 151.
Image © Darrel Tank from GoodSalt.com
How interested are we really in other people’s good, even when we do not profit from their prosperity?
In my ministry I have been asked to speak at numerous funerals. Before the funeral I like to meet with the family in their home, to get stories and learn more about the deceased. I can know someone all my life and still be surprised by what I learn after they are gone. I will be sitting in the family room, listening to selfless heroic stories about the dearly departed, and it touches my heart so deeply, I get emotional and I think to myself that I too, want to be a selfless loving person. Sometimes, after the visit, when I am not feeling so emotional anymore, I have to remind myself of my resolve.
Case in point. When I lived in Texas I started a cleaning business on the side. Nancy was a friend from church. She was a nurse and told a few doctors and nurses about my business, and I was soon cleaning for them. Nancy and I would go to dinner or lunch occasionally, and I offered to pay since she was my best advertiser. She assured me she did not want anything in return. She was just happy to help me out and see me do well.
We were both in our mid 30’s, when one morning I got the shocking news that Nancy had suddenly died during the night. It was quite a shock as we had plans to got to lunch that day. When you are in your mid 30’s and your friends seem healthy, it is very unsettling to hear that the friend with whom you plan to have lunch that day just died! Later as I went to clean for a client Nancy referred to me, the thought struck me, She did so much for me, and I never got to thank her! I realized that on this earth I never would get to thank her by paying her back for her interest in my good. That’s when I told myself, to live a giving life just like her, so that when I am gone, people will say the same about me, he did so much for me, and I never got to thank him.
Only a few days later, the UPS line I was supervising was short-handed. I walked over to another line with a supervisor whom I had helped out several times. I asked him if he could send someone from his line over to help me. He said, “No, I can’t spare anyone right now.” Granted he was right, but at the same time it bothered me because I had often sent him help, but he never seemed to be able to help me. Frustrated I told myself to stop helping him because he never paid me back! Then it dawned on me that I had told myself I wanted to help others so that when I died they could say “I always helped them and they never got a chance to pay me back.” But when the chance actually came, I did not feel that way at all! I had been touched by the selfless love of a caring friend, telling myself that I wanted to be just as loving and giving, but when the rubber met the road I was back to being my same old self again.
Of course all that happened way back in my 30s’. Jesus never made it past his 30’s on earth, but He was still the perfect example. My friend Nancy never made it past her 30’s, but she left me with an example that even in my 50’s I still struggle to emulate. After being raised in the church all my life, I often sigh and think, 50 years later, shouldn’t I be more like Jesus by now? So many people with not even half the advantages I have had are so far ahead of me. Yet how to grow spiritually is no secret. Jesus went about seeking the good of others, even in their secular affairs. Nancy did the same. The next time someone needs my help, instead of asking myself how they will thank me, I can tell myself, This is my opportunity to be like Jesus. If Jesus helped Nancy, He can also help me to be one who seeks the good of others, even though they may never be able to thank me.
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