Thursday: Conflict Resolution
Daily Lesson for Thursday 11th of December 2025
Read Joshua 22:30-34. How does this entire incident give us some insights into conflict resolution and ways of ensuring the unity of the church? (Compare with Psalms 133:1-3; John 17:20-23; 1 Peter 3:8-9.)
The story of Joshua 22:1-34 has several principles of communication that can apply to everyday human relationships in the family, church, and community.
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When things go wrong, or seem to go wrong, the best thing to do is to communicate instead of suppressing our observations until they explode. It is good for God’s people not to remain indifferent when problems seem to arise. Of course, had the Transjordanian tribes communicated their intent of building an altar, the whole issue could have been avoided.
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Even if one is convinced about their judgment, do not jump to hasty conclusions. The West Jordan tribes were quick to believe the rumor that reached their ears and to draw the false conclusion that the East Jordan tribes already had apostatized.
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Talk about the real or perceived problems before you act on your conclusions.
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Be willing to make a sacrifice in order to achieve unity. The West Jordan tribes were willing to give up part of their allotment to accommodate the other tribes, if being on the other side of the Jordan was the cause of their assumed apostasy.
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When accused, falsely or rightly, give a gentle answer that turns away wrath. To answer an accusation with a counter-accusation will never lead to peace. Try to understand before attempting to be understood.
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Rejoice and bless God when peace is reestablished. It is wonderful to see that the main Israelite congregation experienced genuine joy when they learned about the true motivation of the two-and-a-half tribes. They were not so proud of their judgment that they could not admit they were wrong in making it.
Image © Erik Stenbakken at Goodsalt.com
Had the East Jordan tribes apostatized, the people of Israel would have applied the requirements of the covenant. Unity can never be an argument to water down truth or give up on biblical principles. However, church discipline should always be the last (and not the first) resort, after attempts at reconciliation and pastoral assistance based on God’s Word have failed. How different would our churches look if these simple principles were consistently applied!
We live in a world that thrives on competition and conflict. In business, it is not enough to have a good product to sell on its own merit. You have to portray the competing products as faulty or defective. Your brand is healthy and organic, while the other brands are full of fats and sugar. In politics, depending on your alignment, the other side are godless communists or arrogant and inhuman monsters.
We rely on stereotypes to get our points home. Stereotyping is where we take the characteristics we don’t like and apply them to the whole group. And it is easy to make enemies that way. I grew up in the aftermath of World War 2 and even the kid’s comic books were still characterising the enemy as the Horrible Huns who swore in words that had lots of “z”s in them. (I wasn’t supposed to read them but… so much for parental control)
The stereotyping continues into our interactions with church members. The Rwandan conflict a couple of decades ago is a sad reminder of what happens when we let stereotypes overrule our moral boundaries. You only need to visit websites associated with Adventism, particularly those with a very specific point of view to see stereotypes being used to characterise the liberals, conservatives, or whatever as being apostate.
Such language is divisive. Granted there are issues on both sides that need dialogue but we need to do it without the rancour of stereotyping.
It is a reminder too that we often build barriers to our conversations with other Christians by the language we use to describe them. Labelling other churches as “apostate” does little to encourage conversation and friendship. I grew up with the word “papacy “. That provided a barrier between me and a whole group of folk who, in many respects, are wonderful Christians. Some of the best perspectives I have had in recent years on the treatment of disenfranchised folk have come from practising Roman Catholics.
I am not suggesting compromise in our beliefs, but if we want to influence people, we should stop using stereotypes to maintain fences between them and us.
Normally, biblical principles are still applied, but when a problem actually arises and one attempts to solve it, there is a tendency to try to resolve it using human (or worldly) methods.
Would you like to expand on that idea a bit Soo Han? I’m asking because sometimes I see God using unexpected ways of solving problems.
Human conflicts (disagreement, tension, opposition or disputes) between individuals or groups of people are inevitable because of differences in interests, values, goals, opinions, and perceptions. It should be noted that not all conflicts are negative. Some disputes can lead to positive outcomes, such as better understanding, growth, innovation and peace if managed properly. In the biblical context, conflict is not a social problem but a spiritual one. Scripture places the source of all human conflicts squarely within the human heart. Jesus identified the heart problem as the root cause of all human evil, including disputes. “For from within, out of a person’s heart, come evil thoughts,….” (Mark 7:21-22). Likewise, the Book of James identifies the heart as the source where all conflicts start.
“What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?”(James 4:1).
James is simply saying that unless we deal with our selfish desires, covetousness, pride, unredeemed passions and wanting our way over God’s way, human conflicts will always ravage mankind. Therefore, the most effective conflict resolution mechanism is to subject our hearts under the authority of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ through the power of the Holy Spirit.
“For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength”. (Philippians 4:13, NLT).
Conflict is everywhere, manifested in monumental terms or at times in small, everyday ways. For example, in the workplace we can be irritated by co-workers, angry with a boss, or frustrated by those we interact with. In the neighborhood, people can be constantly annoying. In our homes, our spouses or children are not spared either. Yet the Bible challenges us and calls us to a higher expectation: “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.” (Romans 12:18)
In situations of conflict, it is unhelpful to focus on self-protection and self-interest, as the Bible points out that “the flesh” or “the old self” can only yield pride that leads to contention (Proverbs 13:10). We must understand that there is an ego within us that seeks to protect its own interests, and our natural response when we sense conflict is often to pull up the drawbridge and prepare for a fight in self-defence. But when we choose humility and peace, we open opportunities and doors for healing and restoration.
I am thankful for your statement that self-protection is unhelpful in conflict. I have been dealing with a situation where I have been doing exactly that. I hadn’t even considered that I could be making things worse. The details are not appropriate to share here, but I would appreciate prayers for a peaceful resolution and restored relationships in this situation.
The best thing to do in a conflict is to wait on the Lord. I need to rely more on Him in some of these situations, since I often speak faster than I think (rsrs). Thank God He is merciful and shows His love, as I learn to trust Him through all my struggles, because He perfectly demonstrates how much higher are His ways! May He continue to be my judge.
The worlds ‘conflict resolution’ is not based on the same principles our Christian ‘conflict resolution’, but both look out to balance their ‘bottom line’. The world seeks influence through power; Christians want to assure that God’s Will and Way are preserved.
Both have their own resources to find and establish the bottom line – the more information, the better. Both experience that prejudice ‘skews’ the outcome to favor those ‘in power’, and both ought to make sure to ‘keep it at bay’.
I think it to be much easier for the church to establish a healthy approach to ‘conflict resolution’, as the Holy Spirit and Scripture guide us – spiritually and practically. We are called to love our God with all our heart and look out for the interests of our fellow man equitably, just as we do for our own – Mark 12:30-31; Matt.22:38-39.
The entire incident provides an illustrative example of a speculative rumor, and the approach one must adopt to inquire about a doubtful message capable of triggering tempers to escalate a major conflict in society. I would applaud the knowledge and wisdom God poured into Phinehas’ heart to initiate a plan to address the rumor because he devised a plan to inquire about the rumor with a calm approach. Usually, if one conveys a disturbing message with a soft tone and shows a sign of concern and a willingness to address the situation to avoid a major consequence, the other party involved in the situation will respect the courtesy and respond in the same way. In times of receiving a doubtful message in an unprecedented manner, one must bear in mind that if one reserves the need to learn about the facts of the matter politely, the manner of composure will calmdown tempers to resolve the situation, and eventually unite the parties involved in the conflict.
The lesson reminds us of how God condemned Abimelech, who lawfully married Sarah, but later appeared to him that the woman was another man’s wife, and to avoid death, he should restore the woman to her lawful husband. Although Abimelech protests that he lawfully acquired the woman, God reminds him that even though he has done what seems to be right before men, he will sin against Him (Genesis 20:1-17). The story speaks of God’s fears, what one may consider to be lawful but could be unlawful to God, what one may achieve if one complies with God’s wishes, and what will happen if one disobeys God. I, for one, believe that when the fear of the Lord is in control, one will always be submissive to God’s will.
The biggest insight I gleaned from the verses today is that the West tribes were genuinely happy to find out that the other tribes were faithful. I think, sadly, that’s not always the case. Naming no names, but some people actually seem happy to identify problems in the church and report them.
We can be so unsure of our own status with God that we actually are happy to see people who are failing spiritualy. I think we can believe that it makes it more likely that we are on the right side if we can identify many who aren’t. But that’s not the attitude God wants us to have.
Thursday’s lesson states: Had the East Jordan tribes apostatized, the people of Israel would have applied the requirements of the covenant.
What were the requirements of the covenant?
I think the lesson is referring to Deuteronomy 13:12-18 which relates to a city that is practicing idolatry. The same principles would apply here.